Pine to Palm, the race! Also could be called, DDWLHL (the day Dan will lose his legs). Because they will fall off. From pain and sadness.
You should buy a dog now, and then like... starve him and beat him (I don't actually recommend hurting animals) when it gets towards race time. Make sure he knows its you that is doing it. Then, when you are at your lowest point during the race Jade can release him somewhere close behind you. Good idea?
Kevin Hurley is a horrible, horrible animal torturer....It's not a bad idea though...btw, be careful with your knees, man. My mom has knee pain, possibly from running incorrectly when she was young, and it doesn't look fun.